don ever give up

2009-04-17T22:46:00.000+08:00

how can i understand why?

what is love?

love?

sigh~

2009-03-11T17:14:00.001+08:00

due to the fact that people keep chasing me 2 update....i shall update...ok...done...-.- =p

hehe....

okay......now is the common test period...its crazy...but oh well...

GP was rofl...

H1 phy was....HAHAHAHAHHAHA.....

chem was hmm.....(i studied for 2 hours....will die...violet almost wan scream at me....oh wells...)

chinese is tml...hmm...will die...no doubt....

maths..........jus dun b a wtf paper.....

shall have no holidays....woooohoooo...

fri to sun....confi camp...facilitating....

mon to wed.....utc.....

thurs.....batam recee....

fri.....slp/stc meeting....

sat........church.....

sun...prepare for monday.....

okay...its gonna be a crazy week.....

looking forward 2 it....woooohooooo

2009-02-05T22:31:00.003+08:00

ill write this specially for Mr Ng Kang Rui

the simple joys of life and love and smiling

jus by putting your hands around your loved ones, the contentment when you hold the hands of your loved ones, the smile on your loved ones' faces and the most genuine smile that you could ever see is when your with them. The smile that is shown when u r really content is one that can spread love.

a few things which bring about simple joy:

praying

grabbing your loved ones' arms

lying down on ur loved ones' shoulders

doing weird and random stuff with your friends

listening to the radio playing slow songs in an air con room in a hot afternoon.

stoning at your loved ones

seeing those u care about laughing and smile

being carefree.

losing out on material gains after helping another person

knowing that you are loved, by one or by all!

2009-02-01T01:43:00.002+08:00

> Follow these instructions:
1. Put your iTunes/Napster/Zune Player/WinAmp/etc on shuffle.
2. For each question, press the next button to get your answer.
3. YOU MUST WRITE THAT SONG NAME DOWN NO MATTER HOW SILLY IT SOUNDS!
4. Tag 10 or more friends

IF SOMEONE SAYS "IS THIS OKAY" YOU SAY?
心型圈 totally no link lo....

WHAT DO YOU LIKE IN A GUY/GIRL?
behind thse hazel eyes.......lol...i like hazel eyes????crazy

HOW DO YOU FEEL TODAY?
关于...getting more no link alr....

WHAT IS YOUR LIFE'S PURPOSE?
Someday We'll Know...Mandy Moore....got link...someday i'll know my life's purpose

WHAT IS YOUR MOTTO?
When Your Gone.....Avril Lavigne....ok....no link

WHAT DO YOUR FRIENDS THINK OF YOU?
刘三姐-女子十二月坊....linkless

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR PARENTS?
All For One....HSM......right....literally....all are 1 parent

WHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT VERY OFTEN?
简单爱-Jay.....lol...think wat u wan.not true.

WHAT IS 2+2?
Because Of You....rigth.so because of u, 2+2=4?

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR BEST FRIEND?
思念是一种病-张震岳........nth 2 say

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF THE PERSON YOU LIKE?
都是你-光良....lol

WHAT IS YOUR LIFE STORY?
受了点伤-阿桑....very true...

WHAT DO YOU WANT TO BE WHEN YOU GROW UP?
I Wanna Be With You...Mandy Moore............LOL

WHAT DO YOU THINK WHEN YOU SEE THE PERSON YOU LIKE?
Bad Day....lol.....

WHAT DO YOUR PARENTS THINK OF YOU?
God is in Control....Point of Grace

WHAT WILL YOU DANCE TO AT YOUR WEDDING?
Free...Corrinne May..rather emo 2 tis song

WHAT WILL THEY PLAY AT YOUR FUNERAL?
Shut Up...Simple Plan...iem dead....alr shut up...LOL

WHAT IS YOUR HOBBY/INTEREST?
Love Song-方大同...lol

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR FRIENDS?
恋爱达人 - 罗志祥&小S haha

WHAT'S THE WORST THING THAT COULD HAPPEN?
HSM....again...LOL....We're all in this together....if its a bad thing...

HOW WILL YOU DIE?
为你写诗..........lol

WHAT IS THE ONE THING YOU REGRET?
你的香气...郭静...lol

WHAT MAKES YOU LAUGH?
My World....Avril

WHAT MAKES YOU CRY?
一个人走...lol

WILL YOU EVER GET MARRIED?
Whispers in my heart.....loll....may b if i whisper, i noe the ans?lol

WHAT SCARES YOU THE MOST?
I'll Never break your heart...Backstreet Boys. really meh?

DOES ANYONE LIKE YOU?
Only Hope...Mandy Moore....so i hope so?

IF YOU COULD GO BACK IN TIME, WHAT WOULD YOU CHANGE?
Sway.Michael Buble...so i jus sway when i go back in time?

WHAT HURTS RIGHT NOW?
Save Me..Corrinne May...saving me doesnt hurt...

WHAT WILL YOU POST THIS AS?
Come In With The Rain..Taylor Swift....weird

tagged by yanne
tagged:
1.Timothy...go do
2. Isabelle...go do
3. Paul...go do..even though u wont
4. Donovan...give u sth 2 do
5. JW...dun all SHE songs hor
6. Shanice....
7. Candy
8. Samantha....confirm all P&W if u do
9. XYY
10. Nyssa

2009-01-20T17:00:00.002+08:00

1. Who's the one who tagged you?
Donovan Ng Kang Rui

2. What's your relationship with him / her?
LOL....friend...college in NP

3. What's the best gift he / she has given you?
well, advice in life n in NP

4. What's the best gift you gave him / her?
A listening ear....no more...feel sad....

5. What's his / her religion?
Free thinker.

6. What's his or her favourite phrase?
"Whatever..."

7. What kind of person is he / she?
Hmm... a very interesting person, very patient or so he says....

8. What's the worst thing that ever happened to you?
worst thing???no idea.....nothing is bad if God has a hand in it

9. What's one thing you really wish for for your birthday this year?
one memorable day that i will remember for life

10. What's the happiest thing that happened in your life?
can i list a few?

1. Baptism

2. Meeting Paul, tim, isa, .

11. What is one thing you want to change in the world should you have the chance?
All existence of money shall cease.

12. What's your favourite movie?
A walk to remember

13. What's your favourite number?
dun have really, but 7 is nice

14. What will you do one day before the world comes to an end?
Tell those whom i love that i really treasure the time spent with them.

15. Who or what has made the greatest impact in your life?
The no.1 school in the world - Saint Joseph's Institution!

16. Tag 10 people to do this quiz:
1) Timothy
2) Isabelle
3) Roy Yong
4) Paulina
5) Candy..haha
6) Samantha (if ur blog is alive)
7)
8)
9)
10)

17. What kind of person is (2)?
emo, kind n good listener

18. When's (5) birthday?
22nd Dec every year

19. How are (1) and (10) related?
who;s number 10?

20. Who does (3) have a crush on?
wah hahaha...shall silence myself

21. How are (4) and (6) alike?
hahaha....nice people, kind people, wonderful people, good listeners and the list goes on and on....

22. What's (9) special characteristic?
lol...dunno number 9

23. Who is (7) to you?
lol...dunno number 7

24. What do you admire about (8)?
lol...dunno number 8

25. Who do you trust the most from (1) to (10)?
everyone of them...

26. Who do you owe to the most from (1) to (10)?
everyone of them

27. Who do you want to slap the most from (1) to (10)?
no one...cnt bear 2

2009-01-03T23:56:00.002+08:00

well, its the new year....n i shdnt be leaving this dead....hahaha....well

happy belated new year everyone...

hahaha

new year resolutions

1. stay in t21

2. be a better person

see..short and sweet....and v hard to achieve.......

2008-12-10T00:40:00.001+08:00

alright...shall write my 201st post...haha...long time no post...so now i shall post again...in CHINA....back in the mother land....haha...haha....well, timme 2 slp...haha...cuz like 1am alr...confirm kena nagged

2008-11-10T20:39:00.002+08:00

results r out

promote n change class

or go poly?

which is better?

poly appeals 2 me more

though only 1 support me in going poly....

every1 else wan me go j2 n change class....):

2008-10-30T23:02:00.002+08:00

its been such a long time since i blow up till like this.such a long time since i almost got into a fight...and of all places there....ugh...what on earth is happening?
i can be nice if i want to, but if u piss me off, then fuck off and think about wat u did. u freaking disturbed me, its ok. but u also disturbed every1 else. tt's wad made me fucking pissed. n tt guy jus have 2 appear n make things worse....zzzz....irritating ppl

2008-10-29T23:05:00.002+08:00

for the 1st time, some1 said my blog is dead...haha...thx rachel koh....well, life has been eventful these few days....training is tml...it will be fun...especially when its getting too noisy...
drill test?
v interesting.....
well, A lvl MT paper tml. Good luck ppl
O level still happening...good luck ppl
op on fri...jiayou...

2008-10-20T01:01:00.002+08:00

i think ill close tis blog once it hits 200 posts and move to my other one...

and well, i am tired.

i am happy

i am no longer who i was.

1month

i changed

for the better?

well, i noe i became happier

i noe i became more open n receptive

i noe i became a better listener, but i still cnt console ppl......

2008-10-19T02:31:00.001+08:00

well, 1 attitude that disgusts me and irritates me is arragonce, esp towards seniors. if you don't know someone well enuf, then dun give him/her a cocky attitude, esp towards me. you are a guy, u are sec 4, u shd noe well enuf wat kind of attitude u shd give 2 ur seniors. if u piss me off, then u will b in deep shit.

well, another thing...i really dun like some of the things i see, but then, what can i do?like wat maxi said, "cnt do anything, maybe we don't see the whole picture. maybe we don't know the other side of things." but then again, if even maxi is pissed at it, it jus shows that it really is unbearable. it really pains me to see someone being treated like this. she's like a sister to me and i never liked any1 to treat any of my sisters and brothers like this. esp when u dun have a reason to do so.

2008-10-16T22:46:00.006+08:00

A for chem...well, but fail chinese....apply for H3 chem...but due to the fact that i failed chinese...so 99% cnt get...lol...unless a miracle happens........................................

2008-10-16T20:57:00.000+08:00

One night, at 11:30 PM, an older African American woman was standing on the side of an Alabama highway trying to endure a lashing rain storm. Her car had broken down and she desperately needed a ride. Soaking wet, she decided to flag down the next car. A young white man stopped to help her - generally unheard of in those conflict-filled 1960s. The man took her to safety, helped her get assistance and put her into a taxi cab. She seemed to be in a big hurry! She wrote down his address, thanked him and drove away.

Seven days went by and a knock came on the man's door. To his surprise, a giant console color TV was delivered to his home. A special note was attached. It read: "Thank you so much for assisting me on the highway the other night. The rain drenched not only my clothes but my spirits. Then you came along. Because of you, I was able to make it to my dying husband's bedside just before he passed away. God bless you for helping me and unselfishly serving others."

http://www.inspireme.net/inspirational-stories/pick-up-in%20the-rain.htm

randomness

2008-10-15T23:53:00.000+08:00

wooooooooohoooooooooo.........cycled 3 hours 2dae...i think its like 30+km

damn fun..............................

damn long time 4 me 2 reflect............hmm....

things.....

life.........

shall post up a random but touching story here soon.....but now....its bedtime.......well, not yet actually,, but whateva......................lol...

iem totally being random...........

2008-10-14T23:07:00.001+08:00

i think i shd start a new blog and onli allow some ppl 2 read?

tt seems like a good idea...

or i can jus make tis private...

but, see how la...

mayb after i find a nice blogskin....

a walk to remember

2008-10-12T14:03:00.002+08:00

"its like the wind, i can't see it, but i can feel it"

what a beautiful way to describe love...

its the third time i've watched this movie...

and iem still touched by it. the 1st and 2nd time, i was touched, almost cried, but after so many things that happened after the last time i watched it, i cried tis time.i realised how much love meant, how much it can do, and what it can do.the power of love...

love can make such a huge change, with love comes faith and hope in the other person.

love can change a person so much.

from a punk that cannot be saved, to a person who is so good..

love can make a person so strong....to be able to appear that all is fine and to sacrifice ur self and to take on all the hurt by oneself so that the other person will not see u hurt, so that the other person can be happy...

which is stronger? death or love?

death can affect and impact a small group of people, but a person's love can change one person, but the change can change a whole society.

love is so strong, that not even death can change the fact that love can change a person for the better....

friendship...it can be so strong also....its forever strong...no matter what happens between true friends, the love between friends will always be there. and it is what drives us on. "What is a friend? A single soul dwelling in two bodies"--Aristotle

each person appears in another's life for a reason.to help each other, to be each other's angels, to change each other for the better.

the theme of love is maintain throughout the whole film...between lovers, friends, family.

love comes together with faith, faith to believe that someone will be more than who he/she can be.and to love, is to believe. to accept, to forgive, to have hope, to be able to take the courage to admit mistakes, and to change.

love can change characters, love can move mountains....

i have no idea why i can link everything to NP, but yea...well, if we really wanna change their characters, we need to lead properly, with love, but a diff type of love...........

"find out who you are and do it on purpose"

post promo email

2008-10-11T23:23:00.004+08:00

well, promos are over, i've enjoyed 2 days alr...

n i jus have 2 come online today...

saw Mrs Teo's new email...

sigh....

wat a depressent

cant have a bigger dip in emotions alr lol

was so high 40seconds ago then when read finish...

its like so low la...

like what the heck la....

if only my parents cares bout the process rather than d results more...

why do sooooo many people care bout the result?

have our society became so obsessed with results that all that we want is results?

whats a rich person without integrity?

i really hate results...

i love the process of doing things...

it gives me a sense of purpose...

but when it ends, everything collapses

promos are over a better listener

op is coming

ocips are coming a healer of emotions and spirit

my parents are coming 2 kill me

promo results are coming tt's wat i wan to be

so many things are coming

do i nid 2 spend another hour on reflection n prayer again?

i feel like i nid

it helps

but then maybe its jus the perception......

well,

see how la

maybe things wont turn out as bad

i really hope to see 27 people in t21 next year....

crap...jus realised my op presentation is in 20days time....31st oct

wat a nice day 2 spend my halloween...-.-

sigh

='( sianz.....

sigh.........

exams....

results...

op...........

will i be planning d china ocip if andrew is not going??

sigh...

i think i onli noe 1 person who's going 4 the china ocip...

hi dion.......................

lol

to those who r studying for "O" lvls, jiayou.....

to those who r studying for "A" lvls, jiayou.....

sigh

good luck ppl....

promos are over!!

2008-10-11T08:14:00.003+08:00

well, promos are finally over...wooohooo....

had a damn super fun time ytd, though y tiring...

cycled from 10 to bout 145...the road to sji is filled with dangers...like metal bars...went home got my laptop then went to church then brandon lost him ezlink card......so cycle for another 2 hours 2 go look 4 it....damn fun...

haha

lols.

its time 2 slack now....until monday that is....

when sch starts again....

goodbye my friend

2008-10-06T22:26:00.013+08:00

leaving for life is something that is sad

well, if u leave, dun forget me...

we've been frens since P3

8 years of friendship,

we've walked home together,

got into trouble together,

quarrelled

fought

laughed

got punished

and by fate we went to diff schools

i went to the sch u always wanted and u went to a sch tt i would have chose if not for my parents

our lifes intertwined

we were friends

and now as you leave,

i cnt help but think back at all the times we had together

the fun times

if life permits,

we will see each other again

if life permits

we will continue to be friends

i will always praying for you

i will always think of the times we had together

friends will never forsake each other

if u have any trouble,

jus find me

even if i cnt help

i will listen

if u ever see this

life will be hard

i cnt send u off

but i will forever remember u, even if u forget me

good luck man!

Friends Forever
Vitamin C
And so we talked all night about the rest of our lives,
Where we're gonna be when we turn 25.
I keep thinking times will never change,
Keep on thinking things will always be the same.
But when we leave this year we won't be coming back,
No more hanging out because were on a different track.
And if you got something that you need to say,
You better say it right now because you don't have another day.

Because we're moving on and we cant slow down.
These memories are playing like a film without sound.
And I keep thinking of that night in June,
I didn't know much of love but it came too soon.
And there was me and you and well we got real blue,
Stay at home talking on the telephone, with me,
We'd get so excited and we'd get so scared,
Laughing at ourselves thinking life's not fair.

And this is how it feels.

As we go on,
We remember,
All the times we,
Had together,
And as our lives change,
come whatever,
We will still be
Friends Forever.

So if we get the big jobs and we make the big money,
When we look back now will our jokes still be funny?
Will we still remember everything we learned in school,
Still be trying to break every single rule?
Will little brainy Bobby be the stockbroker man?
Can Heather find a job that won't interfere with her tan?
I keep, keep thinking that it's not goodbye,
Keep on thinking its our time to fly,

And this is how it feels.

As we go on,
We remember,
All the times we,
Had together,
And as our lives change,
come whatever,
We will still be
Friends Forever.

La,la,la,la...yeah, yeah...la, la, la, la
We will still be,
Friends Forever

Will we think about tomorrow like we think about now?
Can we survive it out there?
Can we make it somehow? (somehow)
I guess I thought that this would never end,
And suddenly it's like we're women and men.
Will the past be a shadow that will follow us round,
Or will these memories fade when I leave this town?
I keep, keep thinking that its not goodbye,
Keep on thinking its our time to fly.

As we go on,
We remember,
All the times we,
Had together,
And as our lives change,
come whatever,
We will still be
Friends Forever.

As we go on,
We remember,
All the times we,
Had together,
And as our lives change,
come whatever,
We will still be
Friends Forever.

As we go on,
We remember,
All the times we,
Had together,
And as our lives change,
come whatever,
We will still be
Friends Forever.

As we go on,
We remember,
All the times we,
Had together,
And as our lives change,
come whatever,
We will still be
Friends Forever.

Friends Forever
Mandy Moore
Remember when we used to talk all night?
We didn't get much sleep
Talkin' 'bout and plannin'out our lives
And who we're gonta be
Things were so much different then
Our lives have changed so much my friend
But you and I will always believe

(::-::chorus::-::)

'Cause we'll be
You'll see
We'll be
We'll be Friends Forever

We'll be
You'll see
We'll be
Like Thelma and Louise

We'll be
You'll See
We'll be
we'll be Friends Forever
Friends Forever
Friends Forever

I know that he's been hurtin' you
I've known for a while
Now you've found love in someone new
I can see it in your smile

I swear your secret's safe with me
Won't tell nobody what I see
What you need is perfect trust in me

(--repeat chorus--)

We all need
Someone we can trust
A Friend
Of our own
I swear your secret's safe with me
Your not alone

Together
Forever
You can depend
Together
We will fight
'Til the end
oh yeah

everyone from 6/1 wishes you bon voyage and all the best

it has been a wonderful time with u

TAKE FLIGHT AND BE YOURSELF!

see you soon!take care man!

2008-09-22T20:33:00.004+08:00

玲珑心
作者：虹莲
一个男孩从18岁就爱上了一个女孩。他们是一届，但不是一个班，男孩想，等上了大学他就会表白，因为男孩喜欢女孩的笑如春花，喜欢她清纯的声音和细细的丹凤眼，他觉得这个女孩就应该是他的，他想，再等等吧。
　　他们同时考上了大学。为了自己心爱的女孩，他也选择了同样的大学，而本来他可以上更好的学校。上大学后女孩开始了缤纷的大学生活，每天这个社团那个社团的，男孩看到女孩过得这么快乐就想，再等等吧。于是他仍旧没说。
　　大二的情人节，他终于鼓足勇气去表白，却发现女孩的窗前已有了一枝红玫瑰，他甚至都没有把藏在夹克中的红玫瑰掏出来。女孩问，有事吗？他结结巴巴地说，没，没有，我只是想找你开个老乡会。女孩失望地看着他，然后给那枝红玫瑰浇了水，说是同班的班长送的。
　　毕业后女孩结了婚，男孩却一直没谈恋爱，他只是一路追随着女孩回到了他们的小城，本来他是有机会留在大都市的，可为了自己爱的女孩他认了。
　　他对任何人都没有说过自己的心愿，别人为他介绍对象，他总是笑着拒绝，人们都以为他条件太高了太挑剔了，所以渐渐地很少有人再管他的事，他也总是一个人听听音乐看看书，不知道还要把这份感情守多久。
　　有一次同学聚会大家都喝多了，有人开他们俩的玩笑，说他近水楼台没得着月，他笑着，什么也没说，倒是女孩喝多了酒，看着他的眼说：人家看不上我。他愣在那里，想起没拿出来的那枝玫瑰，此时已变成了他心底的朱砂痣一般，让他心疼。他本来想告诉她他的爱，可是他想，太晚了，真的太晚了。他不知道女孩的婚姻已发生了变故，她正在办离婚。
　　等到女孩离完了婚，他想终于可以说了，因为女孩也爱他啊，他不明白他们怎么就错过了呢，本来上天给过他机会，给过他们一段好姻缘，可是为什么偏偏到这里才给他一个结局？
　　然而不幸的是这还不是结局，在他正要表白的时候他被查出了患了癌症，他不忍心让女孩为他担心为他分担痛苦，所以，他仍旧没有说。他想，让他带着这个秘密直到生命的尽头吧。
　　女孩来看他，表白了可以照顾他，他笑着说，我看不上你，我要看上你早就表白了，何苦等到现在？女孩自尊心受了伤害，从此再不来看他。有时候他会一个人在病床前发呆，看着窗外的树叶渐渐地飘落，他想，他的爱情也像这秋天的树叶，正在一片片地落下来，最后埋藏在地下，成为一颗玲珑心，只是，谁也不知道他曾怎样的爱过啊！
this story touched me...
sometimes telling is better...
better to suffer alone than to suffer together...
better for only one to suffer...
sigh...

i guess this shall be my last post until promos is over......

1 more thing......

i wont reply sms liao cuz my bill BOMB liao....until after promos

2008-09-21T01:30:00.001+08:00

sigh... just reformatted my computer yesterday... now everything also gone... all my games... luckly backuped my music and everything if not ill be crying lol sigh... sianz... all my games gone my emoticons also... zzz

2008-09-20T21:38:00.002+08:00

ytd was the most screwed up day

din sleep

com crashed at 4+. jus after eating a kitkat.

sigh...had to rush thru wr all overr again adn then rush 2 print

realised bought the wrong paper adn had to search the house upside down 2 look for paper then took cab to school and finally handed in the WR.then fell asleep in LCF's class.felt damn bad...

but wat i took back was how fast i started blaming God when things went wrong and realised that i soooo far away from God..sigh

2008-09-15T21:01:00.003+08:00

2dae went church studied abit then went out cycling with paul

well, it has been a long time since i last cycled.my bike is screwed

lol

well, it did get my mind off things and i must say that the company i have everyday is great!

2008-09-14T01:10:00.002+08:00

it always like this

at the most crucial moment that i start stoning and lose all purpose and don't feel like doing anything

if i can jus calm down

and really study

then it will be a miracle

but miracles do happen??

i wish it could happen now...

2008-09-12T23:44:00.002+08:00

drinking coffee at this time is weird and bad for the health

but because of the exams, i will heck it.

a wonderful day has passed.

so wanted 2 change place 2 a more conducive one but apperently violet din think its necessary,

well, we'll jus c whether i make or break

training 2dae was inspiring and abit grr...

3 passed the test,

well don told me 2 b strict and i did

mayb a bit 2 much

but the dragging of the boots were 2 irritating 2 ignore.

well, read more of donovan's blog la

2008-09-11T23:47:00.002+08:00

well, confucius could be like new name...

i am so confused now la...

zzz...

maybe i think too much.

tt's the case?

well, if it is then maybe not so bad.

if i cnt understand my own feelings.

then...sigh...

well, some people think they are so good and if they continue to treat those whose ranks are higher than them the same way they are doing so now, then things will get very ugly.

if u do not have basic respect for those with higher rank than u, what makes u think u will get respect? if we give u so much face and put hope in u and gave u a high position and u do not respect us, then what is the point of putting u there?if we can put u there, we can also get u down from there. if u continue to be so arrogant, then we will have to take drastic measures. if we treat u like an adult, and believe tt u have the common sense to correct urself without us pointing out your mistakes, then we expect to see that. if we do not and we punish u, u wld be unconvinced and then u wld argue and another repeat will be seen.

i hate to deal with people like you who have the potential but lack the attitude. no matter what we do, u will still remain the same. if u can change, then it means either u found out urself or ur girlfriend or someone u love tell u tt. it wont be pretty.

if u really do not see the need to change and continue to think tt we are jus there to spoil everything and take over training, then u can continue 2 think like tis. if we see a need to pump NCOs, then it will be done. it will not be the 1st time NCOs are being pumped.

every batch of NCO has been pumped by a CI. it will not be the 1st. but an individual NCO being pumped because of his attitude may be a 1st time.

well, enuf of the threats and my feelings towards tt guy. he will noe who he is, if he bothers 2 read it.

sigh................................

defragmenting my brain now...mayb will have my feelings sorted out....

2008-09-08T20:22:00.002+08:00

well, masks are well, they can be good at times, but bad at times.

sometimes we put on masks to hide our sorrows and fears, but other times, we hide ourselves.

with friends, how do we know whether thery're putting on masks or not?

well, if they're ur true friends and u noe them well enuf, you would know whether they're putting on masks or not.

its uncanny to see someone sooooo like u in many ways

and well, it happens. but when it happens wat do u do?

do u like help them to not make the same mistakes u made or do u jus leave them be?

when they are like u, so stubborn in many ways, but smart in other ways.

when u noe how they will react before something is actually said, when u noe what they are gonna say b4 the word comes out of their mouth. when u noe how they feel ad what they wana do...sigh

wat do u do??

2008-09-07T22:23:00.007+08:00

well, crashing weddings is fun.

Congrats on getting married Ms Violet Teo, (oops i mean Mdm/Mrs Violet Teo liao =p)

well, today's homily touched me. though not every one of Fr. John-Paul's homily i understand.y screwed up things that happened around me, i really have nothing to say.after 1 week of reflections and not taking the eucharist during weekday masses, it feels really good to have the eucharist again.well, God is forgiving, "Bearing with one another and forgiving one another, if any have a complaint against another. Even as the Lord hath forgiven you, so do you also."God can forgive us without a second thought, but can i do the same?as i feel my heart is like one of steel, i need God's love to melt.when will i forgive him?

today's RCIY retreat video is called "The Fourth Wise Man". Artaban is a young Magi (Wise Man) who desires to follow the star to the birthplace of the coming King, against the counsel of his friends and family. Carrying three precious jewels to give to the baby Messiah, Artaban and his reluctant servant Orontes set off to join the caravan of the three other wise men. They miss the caravan, but Artaban continues the search for his King, always one step behind. Artaban spends much of his remaining wealth and all of his energy helping the poor and unfortunate people he meets, until at the end of his life he finally finds Jesus--at His trial!He had 3 precious items to gove the Messiah when he thought he will meet him, but he had to give them away during the trip on finding the Messiah and in the end, Christ told him that when he helped the other people and gave the precious items away, he was actually helping Christ Himself. this reminds me of how Christ said,:"for where there are two or three gathered together in My name, there am I in the midst of them"if the wise man did not help any of the needy he meets, he would have seen Christ, but it would have been a different ending, he would not have enjoyed salvation. he may see Christ, but what good will it do?

we all search for something higher. we search for answers, but when we see the answers, we are disappointed, cuz its not the one we are searching for.then we deceive ourselves, thinking that we are still searching for the answer, but when we finally see that the one we think is not true, we are too late.answers we search is all around us just like how Christ is around us.well, depends on how we see it, the answers we search for can be easily found, jus whether we wanna accept it or not.

i have made so many people's life quite upside down.
i have troubled so many people.hmm...
the prodigal son...a touching story
one that will impact my life.

currently, there are only a few things i live for: friends, God, studies and surprisingly NP.without my friends: my GF (guy friend= u noe who u r) and my BF (best/boy friend = maxi) and the PUB (pull up buddies not pull up bar...zzz...got overlap, but then nvm) and my sis and many others...........i am so not gonna write any names...
a few names keep appearing in my prayers, and i wonder why....i mean i noe why la but dunno how 2 out into words...zzz.....they impacted my life no doubt, they gave me hope and they kept me alive emotionally and they kept me sane.
faith, something which i have, i trust in God, which is why i pray and go to Mass, but how does having faith actually feel like?i know the feeling once i feel it, but now, do i have faith?how sure of myself am i? Help me Lord...
scandals are damn irritating...so many people are alr irritated enuf with the scandals alr......NO MORE SCANDALS PLS!!!

zzzz.......i am so tired of scandals about anyone....zzz.........includes u jerrick
promos are coming in a few more days.not much time left and i still havent start studying seriously, maybe i really will hardcore study from tml or tonight onwards.

2008-09-05T23:36:00.005+08:00

dreams and realities are different, feelings and what we think it is and what actually happens are different. when dreams and reality are mixed up, when what seems to be real is not and what is not real seems real, when life promises some things but never seems to deliver, when friendships turn sour, when we fail in our trust and when we fail to understand how we are feeling, when understanding of how trust and faith feels like evades me, i can only say this:
Lord, i am lost. Please find and guide me back to the right path. God, my Father, be my Guide and Help and let me rest on Your gentle shoulders. Let me understand how i feel and what i have to do. Father, help, bless and guide them too. I pray for them to be happy always. Amen.

2008-09-02T21:28:00.002+08:00

i hate confrontations
it shouldnt be posted
so i shall jus send u

everything is so screwed up........................................................

2008-08-31T20:55:00.001+08:00

Welcome to My Life
Simple Plan

Do you ever feel like breaking down?
Do you ever feel out of place?
Like somehow you just don't belong
And no one understands you
Do you ever wanna runaway?
Do you lock yourself in your room?
With the radio on turned up so loud
That no one hears you screaming

No you don't know what it's like
When nothing feels all right
You don't know what it's like
To be like me

To be hurt
To feel lost
To be left out in the dark
To be kicked when you're down
To feel like you've been pushed around
To be on the edge of breaking down
And no one's there to save you
No you don't know what it's like
Welcome to my life

Do you wanna be somebody else?
Are you sick of feeling so left out?
Are you desperate to find something more?
Before your life is over
Are you stuck inside a world you hate?
Are you sick of everyone around?
With their big fake smiles and stupid lies
While deep inside you're bleeding

No you don't know what it's like
When nothing feels all right
You don't know what it's like
To be like me

To be hurt
To feel lost
To be left out in the dark
To be kicked when you're down
To feel like you've been pushed around
To be on the edge of breaking down
And no one's there to save you
No you don't know what it's like
Welcome to my life

No one ever lied straight to your face
No one ever stabbed you in the back
You might think I'm happy but I'm not gonna be okay
Everybody always gave you what you wanted
Never had to work it was always there
You don't know what it's like, what it's like

To be hurt
To feel lost
To be left out in the dark
To be kicked when you're down
To feel like you've been pushed around
To be on the edge of breaking down
And no one's there to save you
No you don't know what it's like (what it's like)

To be hurt
To feel lost
To be left out in the dark
To be kicked when you're down
To feel like you've been pushed around
To be on the edge of breaking down
And no one's there to save you
No you don't know what it's like
Welcome to my life
Welcome to my life
Welcome to my life

2008-08-28T22:05:00.008+08:00

THANKS TO EVERYONE TODAY!!!
thanks to the following who made today a wonderful day:
1. Timothy and Roy for their presents and their twin sms and lending a listening ear always
2. Isabelle for wishing me happy birthday and lending a listening ear always
3. Joy for being there and listening to me being random and for the present
4 CJ093--mainly Jessie, YiFeng, Russell, Sameer for the present and for the wonderful OP today
5. Kang Ming for being the 1st one 2 wish me happy birthday
6. 1T21 for the fun times and the tau pok
7. Lowell for the present
8. Nicholas for the pizza tonight
9. Chen Lili for remembering my birthday
10. Nyssa for the super super super early birthday card
11. Kimberly for the sms this morning
12. Andy Ham for the $0.55 that i need to take bus.
13. All who made this day special and awesome

i really have to say that this is the best birthday i have experienced in all my 18years of life
i love u people!!!!!!!!!!!

stay happy always

2008-08-27T23:56:00.005+08:00

if tomorrow i have no headache and am asleep during lectures,
then something is wrong with me.
now i noe y i hate late nights
well
OP mus do a good job.
and however,
i can still find time 2 slack
well, reason is kinda obvious, but i shall not say
well
tml will be the 3rd consecutive day that i bring my laptop to sch.
how interesting...

2008-08-27T21:49:00.002+08:00

well, my mum has gone to the airport
my dad went to send her
and here i am doing OP
well
irritating parents.
always quarrel
when can they stop??
sigh

2008-08-26T22:42:00.002+08:00

for the 1st time, DC's 1st sentence in class is not, "where's my essay?"
but instead, it became, "u all know what i'm going to ask right?"
the response was overwhemling "where's my essay?"

wat an interesting way 2 start a GP lesson

well
headache continued for 1 week alr
wonder how long it will last.
sigh
wat a wonder time
zzzzzzzzzz....

wish i could sleep forever

2008-08-26T00:29:00.001+08:00

en well, the worst thing that can happen when ur searching for pictures to use for OP is that ur internet got prob
super frustrating
sianzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz
tired
well
mum going overseas tml
sian
sigh
wat to say
screwed up family

sigh

2008-08-25T00:24:00.003+08:00

well, WR is done
but i dun think its done to the best of my abilities
i feel so tired and wan rest
this weekend i din even rest at all
fri night slept at 12+ wake up at 6+ on sat and had a super bad day
sat night slept at 12+ wake up at 7+ on sun and had a tiring day
sun night slept at 12+ going to wake at at 5+ on mon and going to be a "fun" day

well...so many homework to be done
well, we'll c how
patrick soon bald

世界如此宽, 距离总是让我们无法坦白, 一切不能重来
tt's andrew's msn display name
somehow makes me think.......

2008-08-24T21:06:00.004+08:00

when i left home this morning, i felt cold.
not only from the cold wind blowing at me, but because i felt cold from my heart.
but when i was on my way home,
though the wind was still cold,
i felt warm, from the heart
its either that or i have fever.

well, i dunno wat to say, but
God has seen you struggling, God says

it's over.

A blessing is coming your way.

JUST 19 WORDS

GOD OUR FATHER,
WALK THROUGH MY HOUSE
AND TAKE AWAY ALL MY WORRIES AND ILLNESSES;
IN JESUS ' NAME. AMEN

This prayer is so powerful.

i was really touched when i saw this email.
i saw it at a time when it meant so much and it really touched my heart when i read it.

no one is ever alone.

2008-08-23T19:21:00.002+08:00

sigh
in what way have they ever treated me well, when did they ever care?
so why should i care?
when i am down, who is there for me?
not them, but my friends.
who listens?
not them.
they say and expect me to do whatever they say
only my friends bother to listen
if they think they are so good they why do they even need me?
oh wait.
u don't need me. you think i need u, but if i live alone, there's no difference. without anyone quarreling in the room beside me
and when i live with you, you make me do this and do that, like a slave
i must do everything you say
i must listen to everyone of your commands
i will rebel
i have already done so
when i do anything i want to do, its wrong
whatever i do is wrong
whatever u do is right
so why do you even bother me to do anything
mite as well as me go die
what difference will it make?
at most the world will have 1 less nuisance
1 more retard gone
more food for the poor
and better life for all who know me
so isn't it better??
why do u even care if i eat?
why do you even bother when all you care is whether i will take care of you when your older?
why do you even bother?

why do i even bother getting angry over them?
why should i even care?
i will not care anymore
its unfair

my fuse is getting as short as my hair...
sigh
有多少次的时候我关心过你们?
有多少次你关心过我?
有多少次我为你们挺身而出?
有多少次你鼓励过我?
有多少次我为你们而哭?
有多少次你无缘无故的骂我?
有多少次你听我说话?
有多少次我为你而伤心?
有多少次你相信过我?
有多少次我信任过你却在最后还是失望?

2008-08-21T22:44:00.001+08:00

i am bald/
really
went to shave
am fever now
chem not done
gp not started
sianzzzzzz

2008-08-20T23:34:00.002+08:00

world war 3
(if u were there u will noe)
3 teachers arguing over who will use the class for remedial
bronze medal: DC
silver:CF
Gold: AL

hahaha
sianz

well, a pic 4 u to enjoy
roy laughed his ass n said tt this is lame...

2008-08-19T23:01:00.001+08:00

such tiring days
night study is quite productive if u compare wat i do at home
i do like 100000000% more at night study la
well
its time 2 read book for a while
then its off 2 sleep
training on friday
have fun

2008-08-17T19:31:00.002+08:00

everytime i see her photo i am reminded of how she changed my life
she always reminds me of how short human life is
she always make me cry when i think of her
her mum passed away last year
i only knew about it this year in march
thx 2 my mum who thinks that iem too young to know bout such things
For Heaven's Sake
she's my aunt
if she passed away, i have every right to know bout it
her child is so young
her child is my cousin la
y cnt i know bout my own relative's death?
what is wrong with u people??
it happened so long ago
but iem still unwilling to forgive my mum
my aunt died
she's my AUNT!!
and u dun wan tell me
what is this man??

2008-08-17T09:14:00.002+08:00

retreat was not say fun but rather inspiring..
became better after the retreat...

sometimes i feel like retreating
but when those times come
somehow i find the courage to face it
i did not know how
but now i know
God is there
He is always beside me

well
i began to think less
and now i think that i may be better
unless something happens that triggers everything

which i hope won't
seriously
when you've been like this for so long
would you want it to continue?

2008-08-15T17:19:00.003+08:00

Happy Birthday Isabelle!!
well went out after sch to do some shopping
bought bout $90 worth of stuff...of which $30 i spent on myself in case ur wondering...
spent the rest on two cards n presents...
well today was ok...
went to sch super early...
reached there at 6.37 am...
like -.-"
then went for morning mass cuz today is Assumption of the Blessed Virgin Mary

sian...
sigh
i really dunno wat is making me feel so sad...
i noe tt it has always been like tis, but this feels worse than before.
i wonder...
i think...
i can do everything but whatever i do is pointless...

and i realise i forgot to do 1 thing...
pray
God
Father
Mother
Son
Holy Spirit
i forgot those
the ones that have an importance place in my heart.
how many times have i went to church just because i think its my duty? and not because i truly want to be in the presence of God??
sigh...
i need You.
i need help.

2008-08-12T21:30:00.001+08:00

time
an essence.
i need more
money
sianz
well
today physics test is interesting..
open book test...

lol
randomization
now

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2008-08-11T19:03:00.003+08:00

yesterday was thinking day
cuz i thought bout alot of things...
well i was out emoing
then there were this group of ppl sitting beside us playing guitar and singing
damn nice la
then they kept singing emo songs...
well, they sure treat us well,they noe wat songs they shd b singing at that time...haha

these swing pictures came into my mind cuz of some1 who said that she wants to go on a swing...
reminds me of when the last time i was on a swing...
swing pics are a bit emo...sigh...

2008-08-09T23:34:00.000+08:00

"Lonely is the traveler, who travels all alone
Lonely is the traveler, who is without a home
Lonely is the traveler, who has no one to care
Lonely is the traveler, who has no one to share
The Lonely traveler is oh so sad -
The Lonely traveler gave all the tears he had
The Lonely traveler is the guardian of the love, hope and dreams
Oh so it seems…
Now the world will have to pay for the Traveler goes away…
For no one would listen… no one paid attention to the warnings
The traveler had
I’m but a lonely traveler who travels space and time
The warnings I gave were not new nor were they mine
They came from another time"

by: U Mahesh Prabhu
from: "http://indiamahesh.wordpress.com/2007/12/05/the-lonely-traveler-poem/"

2008-08-09T20:52:00.002+08:00

yesterday was ok la...
the parade was...haha...well, ya...

the celeb was ok...
the dancing was ok
everything was ok

until i left CCAB.
then i started feeling emo
the feeling lasted till now and will prob last till tml...
sigh..
jealous y?
ice skating was ok la...
learned how 2 ice skate...injured my butt though...its still pain...
its my 1st time k?
can i stop?
sigh
yes i believe so

2008-08-07T21:50:00.006+08:00

looking out of the window, looking at the rain..
it makes me feel more peaceful
rain makes me feel at ease, at peace and it gives me comfort.
sigh...the night is peaceful...

the rain gives me a peaceful feeling, yet it also gives a feeling of loniless...
i wonder why...
it has been such a long time i walked in the rain.

there will come a day when i will find the picture i have been looking for...
hmm...
today was an interesting day...
slept in chinese n physics lect...
surprising, Russell din slp in physics lect...
he even try 2 wake me up...
wow...
spa was ok...
lols
what a tiring day...
tml so many things 2 bring to sch...
sianz...

iem getting more random each day...
iem being lame...
iem jus tired...mentally n physically...

2008-08-06T22:05:00.003+08:00

wahh...
super sian now.....
wr is stupid...
GP is getting on my nerves...

today was fun
supposedly only tau pok yi feng n pat...
but somehow i ended up being tau poked....
well
it was fun....

i realised that my shooting sucks more than i imagined...
i think i noe y
but kinda hard 2 change....
well, nonetheless, i will make it right....

well, Happy Birthday Yi Hui!!!!
wow...
so many ppl birthday this month...
well, ya....

iem tired, bored and random........................

2008-08-06T00:32:00.003+08:00

wow...its 1232 alr...iem still doin WR...but because iem bored and sian, i decided to blog
so i shd start by saying:
Happy birthday Yi Feng!!!!!!!!

right...
now that was something done, i should say that iem totally bored and sick of WR and sick of sleeping at inhumane hours....there's like 5 people online now....me, tim, moth, pok and the forever online ng jun de andrew.....

well
i wonder what andrew is doing...

well...at this hour of the night, listening to emo songs...
what a combination...
such a right combination to do...

jus went to check my ip address...
lols
iem really tired...
sianz.....

lols

2008-08-05T21:17:00.000+08:00

today's RE was interesting...
poverty again.
the TIME magazine is on how to eradicate poverty...
interesting
5 things i find it hard to give up?
well, only 3 people know...
well, i think those 3 should be enuf...
dun nid more to know, though i may decide to tell a few others....

well...
my emotions are all over the place again...
sianz...
keep messing up my mind...
sianz...

i want my emotions to stop jumping all over the place...
its like its on a rollercoaster...
half the time i'm feeling random, the other half when i'm alive, i'm emoing...
over what?
i'm not sure...

well, today was interesting..
teachers should be more responsible.
they shouldn't do things according to their own will only.
they should care about the students more.
what will we do for 2 hours while waiting for you?
sleep?

well, u teachers should think before doing anything.

well, weifeng is not the only one who says bonDing as bonGing...
Mr *** also does that....
Mr *** is the teacher who don't want to tell us wats' his sec sch is..

well, like i said...
my thoughts are all over the place.now i feel that i still need to find the compass and map...
its somewhere along the road...
just whether i am on the wrong road or not...
i feel kinda dumb...
really...jealous??
why does it happen?
it only makes things worse...
so why does that feeling exist?
it causes discord...
its not right...
it shouldn't happen now.
it shouldn't happen at all.
but i think i have it under control.
but my other wierd feelings??
that, i'm not sure...
well....

2008-08-03T20:28:00.002+08:00

well, today was feast day...
it was ok...
wont say its very good
cuz of 1 reason or another...
and i realised that i haven't been emo since friday after the confession...
well, it really helps i guess...
haha
well, i find myself being very random these few days...
and to every1 reading this, look behind u...

a bubble...........................................
hahaha
nigel, paul, poxian...
shuttup
it was started by dong....haha

randomness.............

sianess...........
sianz..........
lols

2008-07-30T23:57:00.002+08:00

my internet is getting on my nerves....
how am i to do my EoM when it disconnects every few minutes?
it disconnects every 10mins and it takes 5mins 2 fix
such a nuiscence....

i really am tired
even after 500ml of coffee...
i still am sleepy....

tomorrow is a long day...
ends at 5...

everyone is tired and many people are emo...
y?

i noe y i am emoing
sigh...
well, life is like this
sianz...i am not only physically tired...
why do we need PW anyways?
what does it test?
what use is there?
how on earth will it help us??
retarded PW
sigh...how i wish i could sleep for a few days...

candy told me that to worry about nothing, then i will have to pray about everything...
how true...
sigh....

2008-07-30T23:23:00.002+08:00

after a while of slow songs and reflection,i agree that i lost my temper.
sorry
but next time, be more tactful
iem already super stressed and ur doing this to me.
i jus came back frm Mass happy and u do tis 2 me.......
sigh
watever la....

2008-07-30T22:49:00.001+08:00

my first vulgarity in this blog....
FUCK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

iem pissed..................
if u dun understand anything, jus shut up and things wont become like this
u started it and u dun wan admit it

2008-07-30T17:35:00.002+08:00

well, it has been a very nice day...
very slack, but im still tired, mainly because i din sleep well last night...
today, i want to go for Mass, but its at 8pm and i still have my EoM to do...
and my GP essay outline and my chinese and so many other homework....
not forgetting studying for chem test...

2008-07-29T18:12:00.000+08:00

Ask, and it shall be given you: seek, and you shall find: knock, and it shall be opened to you.

what a wonder passage....

2008-07-28T22:56:00.005+08:00

life is getting quite meaningless and just this few days,
the word death has came across my mind endless number of times and i am starting to think alot now.
sigh...
if i die, what will happen??
its an act of escaping
i promised not to escape anymore
i won't die anytime soon
sigh...
my emotions are all over the place.
i need 2 be certain of what i feel
all i feel now is a sadness that i can't describe and its affecting me..
i am being overprotective and its not right.
i am looking forward to december where i can finally move away from this hectic life
so many things could happen between now and then
maybe things will be better??
kinda impossible...
well, not kinda, but confirm impossible...

is sacrificing ur own happiness for someone else's happiness worth it?
i think it is...

i think im too confused and blur...
who will help me??

my faith is like come and go...it just wont stay still...
i need to find it...
every night i find it and in the morning, i sort of lose it.
sometimes, i dun even see it at all...

listening to emo songs, typing emo posts, thinking of emo thoughts....
well, what else could be better than that???
maybe being happy and content and being in peace with God and all around me.

may i carry the burdens of those around me....
may i help relieve them from their burdens...
let me carry their burdens....
let me not be the burden but be the carrier of others' burdens...

2008-07-24T18:59:00.002+08:00

Have i been deceiving myself or have i really gotten over you? someone says that i've not gotten over you, but i think i have. Somehow as life gets more tiring, i feel less and less alive and more grumpy when life gets hard. Sorry to all whom i have hurt when i was grumpy. Who will be there to help me when life gets hard?Who will guide me?who will lead me?as life gets more tiring, and as i find myself sleeping later and later, i find my faith thinning and i feel a need to find back my faith and live closer to God. Life is getting stressful and i have never been so stressed before.Maybe JC life is really so sucky and so bad, but its too late to do anything now.Well, as i find myself unable to concentrate on studying at home and unable to pay full attention in class, i need Your help and guidance. as i look forward to meeting You in Your kingdom,i feel super tried and 99% dead. my heart feels heavy and cold like metal. i want to find back the flame that will keep me going and the fire that will let me be me and let me be more focused on what really is important in life. where can i find the fire?what will happen?
most of the time, i take things to emotionally and i somehow let all things affect my emotion which will affect all my decisions. Somehow, there are many things that are not my fault, i feel that i should have done something and there are so many things that i feel responsible towards and many things that don't directly concern me makes me feel guilty as i feel that i can do something about it. i feel the need to do more, but do i have the strength to continue on in life?
sighs...

2008-07-23T23:12:00.000+08:00

寂寞在唱歌

专辑:寂寞在唱歌
演唱:阿桑

天黑了
孤独又慢慢割着
有人的心又开始疼了
爱很远了很久没再见了
就这样竟然也能活着
你听寂寞在唱歌
轻轻的狠狠的
歌声是这么残忍
让人忍不住泪流成河

谁说的
人非要快乐不可
好像快乐由得人选择
找不到的那个人来不来
我会是谁的谁是我的
你听寂寞在唱歌
轻轻的狠狠的
歌声是这么残忍
让人忍不住泪流成河
你听寂寞在唱歌
温柔的疯狂的
悲伤越来越深刻
怎样才能够让它停呢

你听寂寞在唱歌
轻轻的狠狠的
歌声是这么残忍
让人忍不住泪流成河
你听寂寞在唱歌
温柔的疯狂的
悲伤越来越深刻
怎样才能够让它停呢
你听寂寞在唱歌
轻轻的狠狠的
歌声是这么残忍
让人忍不住泪流成河
你听寂寞在唱歌
温柔的疯狂的
悲伤越来越深刻
谁能帮个忙让它停呢
呵～
天黑了
像不会再天亮了
明不明天也无所谓了
就静静的看青春难依难舍
泪还是热的泪痕冷了
哼～

2008-07-22T22:53:00.003+08:00

well,its been super tiring...
its been a hectic 3 days
with EoM and WR sianz...
council installation...
iem 90% dead already...
half the time in sch iem asleep...
siao...
chiong thru WR, then mayb can rest??
we shall see....

2008-07-21T00:13:00.002+08:00

sigh...its so early in the morning and im blogging...
why's that?its because EoM draft 2 is due tomorrow....
sianz....why PW anyways?
its not as if it a good idea. it wont test us anything
like what the heck la...
ok iem going HTA on thurs...who wanna come?

im irritated with PW...
well...
chinese is still undone...
like WTH la....
well, its really getting on my nerves now, but still....
i can handle it...
i nid 2 calm down....

2008-07-19T21:46:00.002+08:00

ptm today...
wah sianz...
sigh....
1st ptm in many many years...
oh wells
sianz............
so much happened since wednesday...
ytd basketball match..
2 games all lost
wth la
1st game lost by 17 points....11 v 28
2nd game lost by 2 points in xtra time...
thanks 2 Augustine la....last 40s u lead by 2 points then anyhow dribble liao lol...
what the heck la

then after that was guitar concert
it was nice, xcept for the SJI sec2s....
the sec2s werent like tt a few years ago...what happen man?
so noisy...
well, after concert went 2 toa payoh 2 eat supper...
then went home...
then 2dae ptm...
tts all i did...
alot of things made me think....but ya...

2008-07-16T22:45:00.002+08:00

"here is a reason to everything one would do.. though it may be a challenge for some but we sure have to be who we are and not put on any mask.. so what if others see you happy but deep inside you aren't? you are lying to them and worst you are lying to yourself.. we want many things in life.. many many.. attention, love, concern, material things, character and many more but what use is there to want if there is nothing done or worst that you are just drowned in your own negativity that totally pulls you away from your fulfilling of your wants.. instead of looking at things from a pessimistic point of view, why not look from the optimistic view and challenge yourself.. it is always easy to break something and get a new one but why not challenge yourself to try and maintain that thing you have? no matter how challenging it may be.. you can't just give up when things are hard for you.. when things are too hurtful but why the hurt? because there is a special connection between you and that thing or may even be person.. so don't you dare in your moment of anger say you do not care about that thing or person.. it may just bring more hurt and it will accumulate.. one may say why not just let go but what is the point of letting go and not caring? won't the same thing happen again in future? how many times would you want it to happen before you see how serious the matter is? what if that person just dies the next moment? you'll live life with full of regrets.. love is a very strong word that is shared amongst everyone.. so use it wisely and not for the sake of saying or for the sake of proving that you are with someone.. sometimes love is a silent word that is meant to be felt and not said.."

these are taken from Paul's blog....
...well, some1 was saying 2dae that he dun care...but really...do u care?
u noe tt u care so y lie?
u noe ur feelings better than i noe them.
u noe how u feel
u noe that u cnt escape from it yet u still choose to run away..
"it may just bring more hurt and it will accumulate"
so how?what will others feel?how will the other party feel?
think bout it
u cnt run away from it
u wont run away frm it i hope
because u will do the right thing.

2008-07-15T21:08:00.003+08:00

"Love cures people-both the ones who gives and the ones who receive it" Dr. Karl Menninger

"It's the action, not the fruit of the action, that's important. You have to do the right thing. It may not be in your power, may not be in your time, that there'll be any fruit. But that doesn't mean you stop doing the right thing. You may never know what results come from your action. But if you do nothing, there will be no result." Gandhi

"The best and most beautiful things in the world cannot be seen, nor touched...but are felt in the heart." Helen Keller

"If we discovered that we had only five minutes left to say all that we wanted to say, every telephone booth would be occupied by people calling other people to stammer that they loved them." Christopher Darlington Morley

"There is a land of the living and a land of the dead and the bridge is love." Thornton Wilder
"If you were going to die soon and had only one phone call you could make, who would you call and what would you say? And why are you waiting?" Stephen Levine

"I am only one; but still I am one. I cannot do everything, but still I can do something; I will not refuse to do something I can do." Edward Everett Hale

"If you treat an individual as he is, he will remain as he is. But if you treat him as if he were what he ought to be and could be, he will become what he ought and could be."Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

True, unconditional love will be displayed in two situation...one when ur in a sad situation, when ur friends does something that really make u happy...and the other when ur in a war or any life threatening situations...when u really will see that true friends will die for you or they will keep the promise that they gave u.

i somehow feel that the class isnt wat it was like b4 the holidays...sigh...

treasure all that you have, because once you lose it, you will never get it back again.

2008-07-13T23:15:00.001+08:00

Scars of Love
-- Author Unknown

Some years ago on a hot summer day in south Florida a little boy decided to go for a swim in the old swimming hole behind his house. In a hurry to dive into the cool water, he ran out the back door, leaving behind shoes, socks, and shirt as he went.

He flew into the water, not realizing that as he swam toward the middle of the lake, an alligator was swimming toward the shore. His mother in the house was looking out the window saw the two as they got closer and closer together. In utter fear, she ran toward the water, yelling to her son as loudly as she could. Hearing her voice, the little boy became alarmed and made a U-turn to swim to his mother. It was too late. Just as he reached her, the alligator reached him. From the dock, the mother grabbed her little boy by the arms just as the alligator snatched his legs. That began an incredible tug-of-war between the two. The alligator was much stronger than the mother, but the mother was much too passionate to let go. A farmer happened to drive by, heard er screams, raced from his truck, took aim and shot the alligator.

Remarkably, after weeks and weeks in the hospital, the little boy survived. His legs were extremely scarred by the vicious attack of the animal. And, on his arms, were deep scratches where his mother's fingernails dug into his flesh in her effort to hang on to the son she loved.

The newspaper reporter, who interviewed the boy after the trauma, asked if he would show him his scars. The boy lifted his pant legs. And then, with obvious pride, he said to the reporter, "But look at my arms. I have great scars on my arms, too. I have them because my Mom wouldn't let go."

You and I can identify with that little boy. We have scars, too. Not from an alligator, but the scars of a painful past. Some of those scars are unsightly and have caused us deep regret. But, some wounds, my friend, are because God has refused to let go. In the midst of your struggle. He's been there holding on to you.

The Scripture teaches that God loves you. You are a child of God. He wants to protect you and provide for you in every way. But sometimes we foolishly wade into dangerous situations, not knowing what lies ahead. The swimming hole of life is filled with peril - and we forget that the enemy is waiting to attack. That's when the tug-of-war begins - and if you have the scars of His love on your arms be very, very grateful. He did not and will not ever let you go.

Never judge another person's scars, because you don't know how they were made.

2008-07-13T22:00:00.003+08:00

looking at the sky,i saw the same star as yesterday.
the feeling iem feeling now is like tt period of time again...
somehow, i doubt its going to get any better
its getting worse nowadays
wat could be done?
i am feeling emo again
but then wats new?

jus went to lib again today...
borrow some books
well,
was reading one n the character in it sounds so like me a few years back...

oh well...
i noe i wanted to type something, but i 4got wat it was...

love is not possessing that someone, its letting go
we do not possess love,
love possess us
we do not find love
love finds us
we give up hope on love
love never leaves us
we may run away from love
but love always finds us
true happiness is not possessing,
its knowing that love is mutual...
one sided love brings a sense of purpose
two sided love brings happiness...

my parents love me...
but they dun show me
they show me a side tt no other parents will show
they show me their angry side
the side that make me so pissed, angry and disappointed.

i have learned how not to let it affect me in talking to others
but i've not yet learned how to not let it affect my emotions...

2008-07-13T17:34:00.006+08:00

"Jean Thompson stood in front of her fifth-grade class on the very first day of school in the fall and told the children a lie. Like most teachers, she looked at her pupils and said that she loved them all the same, that she would treat them all alike. And that was impossible because there in front of her, slumped in his seat on the third row, was a little boy named Teddy Stoddard.

Mrs. Thompson had watched Teddy the year before and noticed he didn't play well with the other children, that his clothes were unkept and that he constantly needed a bath. And Teddy was unpleasant.

It got to the point during the first few months that she would actually take delight in marking his papers with a broad red pen, making bold X's and then marking the F at the top of the paper biggest of all. Because Teddy was a sullen little boy, no one else seemed to enjoy him, either.

At the school where Mrs. Thompson taught, she was required to review each child's records and put Teddy's off until last. When she opened his file, she was in for a surprise. His first-grade teacher wrote, "Teddy is a bright, inquisitive child with a ready laugh." "He does his work neatly and has good manners...he is a joy to be around."

His second-grade teacher wrote, "Teddy is an excellent student well-liked by his classmates, but he is troubled because his mother has a terminal illness and life at home must be a struggle."

His third-grade teacher wrote, "Teddy continues to work hard but his mother's death has been hard on him. He tries to do his best but his father doesn't show much interest and his home life will soon affect him if some steps aren't taken."

Teddy's fourth-grade teacher wrote, "Teddy is withdrawn and doesn't show much interest in school. He doesn't have many friends and sometimes sleeps in class. He is tardy and could become a problem."

By now Mrs. Thompson realized the problem, but Christmas was coming fast. It was all she could do, with the school play and all, until the day before the holidays began and she was suddenly forced to focus on Teddy Stoddard.

Her children brought her presents, all in beautiful ribbon and bright paper, except for Teddy's, which was clumsily wrapped in the heavy, brown paper of a scissored grocery bag. Mrs. Thompson took pains to open it in the middle of the other presents.

Some of the children started to laugh when she found a rhinestone bracelet with some of the stones missing, and a bottle that was one-quarter full of cologne. She stifled the children's laughter when she exclaimed how pretty the bracelet was, putting it on, and dabbing some of the perfume behind the other wrist. Teddy Stoddard stayed behind just long enough to say, "Mrs. Thompson, today you smelled just like my mom used to."

After the children left she cried for at least an hour. On that very day, she quit teaching reading, writing, and speaking. Instead, she began to teach children. Jean Thompson paid particular attention to one they all called "Teddy."

As she worked with him, his mind seemed to come alive. The more she encouraged him, the faster he responded. On days where there would be an important test, Mrs. Thompson would remember that cologne. By the end of the year he had become one of the smartest children in the class and...well, he had also become the "pet" of the teacher who had once vowed to love all of her children exactly the same.

A year later she found a note under her door, from Teddy, telling her that of all the teachers he'd had in elementary school, she was his favorite. Six years went by before she got another note from Teddy.

He then wrote that he had finished high school, third in his class, and she was still his favorite teacher of all time.

Four years after that, she got another letter, saying that while things had been tough at times, he'd stayed in school, had stuck with it, and would graduate from college with the highest of honors. He assured Mrs. Thompson she was still his favorite teacher.

Then four more years passed and yet another letter came. This time he explained that after he got his bachelor's degree, he decided to go a little further. The letter explained that she was still his favorite teacher, but that now his name was a little longer. The letter was signed, Theodore F. Stoddard, M.D.

The story doesn't end there. You see, there was yet another letter that Spring. Teddy said he'd met this girl and was to be married. He explained that his father had died a couple of years ago and he was wondering...well, if Mrs. Thompson might agree to sit in the pew usually reserved for the mother of the groom. And guess what, she wore that bracelet, the one with several rhinestones missing. And I bet on that special day, Jean Thompson smelled just like...well, just like the way Teddy remembered his mother smelling on their last Christmas together.

THE MORAL: You never can tell what type of impact you may make on another's life by your actions or lack of action. Consider this fact in your venture thru life."

my dear NCOs, always remember tt u shd do all u can 2 help the cadets n understand them and make decisions for their own good...

on sundays,i always dun feel like doing anything...its sad,but ya...
well...
sigh........
n on sundays,esp in the afternoon,when iem alone,i also feel abit emo...
well...
it has been like tt since i remember...
so ya...
wel...
i shd try to study now..

2008-07-12T20:22:00.003+08:00

如果说酒后吐真言，那我宁愿喝醉然后自己听听自己的真言。
those words r random tots that came 2 my mind when i saw my dad drink a can of beer jus now during dinner...

i wan to know my feelings and i jus wanna noe whether i really care for them or not...

"Many times in our lives, we are dropped, crumpled, and ground into the dirt by the decisions we make and the circumstances that come our way.

We feel as though we are worthless. But no matter what has happened or what will happen, you will never lose your value. You are special - Don't ever forget it!"

sianz...

2008-07-12T19:50:00.002+08:00

iem feeling a sudden emo feeling...
it will pass...
today went out in the morning with tim n isa to bishan lib...tim helped me borrowed a book cuz i 4got bring my lib card....
well, after tt went for lunch n shop shop then went to church..
well, so many thing have happened and well, ya....
i dunno how to put it in words but im feeling abit of sadness, yet iem not sad...jus lonely with a tinge of sadness...

looking up at the sky, i see a star, it shines so brightly that even with the light from the buildings, it can be seen. looking at the immensely large sky, i feel like a small star, a small dot in the world. yet i noe tt my frens will always be there for me...im never lonely when iem with my frens...whenever iem at home, i feel a sense of loss....they dun understand me, yet they do things their way. they never care bout my feelings, but thats the way things r...

well, shd i take up sign language?
my fren says yes...but i dono...
its every monday...7.30 to 9.45pm...after my training...
well,
i shall c bout it...
ya...

2008-07-11T21:18:00.002+08:00

today was POP.
it was good, but the fallout rate was incredible.
well, the parade was quite well.
every1's 1st parade will always not go according to planned, Jing Han, its ok.
well, i have to say that seeing you guys grown up over the past few years into who u r today really makes me happy.you all have all grown more mature. of all the 4 squads, i mus say that i am more close to the sec4s and sec3s...

To all the Sec4s, u all have demonstrated great leadership and skill and teamwork. and i think that you all are the best group of NCOs ever to lead the unit.i dunno wat to say to u all. u all are such a great batch of NCOs and u all have done an amazing job.
to the sec3s, i have many things to say to u all, but i noe most of all i say will b rebutted my some others and that some wont agree with the way we should treat the cadets. but i dun care, because i will always believe that everyone has an equal chance and that we should be patient with them all and treat them with the same attitude.you all got this far because someone gave u a chance to perform, wont u give all the cadets a chance to perform, no matter how they seem?

there will be people who do not agree on this and thinks that we should jus concentrate on those who are enthu or who have the skills, but its not the case.
servant leadership is not like tis. its serving the cadets, catering to their needs, to do what is right and what will develop them.
well, all should be given equal chance. and we have to forgive them and we have to be objective and think of the cadets above all else.
if protecting and helping a cadet means losing ur rank, will u do it?
if an unrepeant cadet says he will repeant, will u believe him?
if no one trusts that ur correct, will u stand by ur principles, knowing that it is the right decision?
will u forgive ur fellows if they have treated u in a way u did not expect them to?
will u accept cadets and ur peers as how they are?
will u lead and overcome adversities and sacrifice ur time for the development of cadets?
will u care and lead ur cadets as ur child?
thats how Brendan treated u.
will u do what Brendan did to u and help and inspire the rest of the unit?
will u inspire and transform the cadets into true Josephians?
will u do all that u said in the SJI NPCC NCO Creed?
if any of ur answers to the above question is a yes, then, will u keep it as a promise?
i hope u will.
the unit is in ur hands
u r the foundation of the unit
u run the unit
u lead the unit
because of u, the unit will excel
because of everyone u inspired to be a true Josephian, the unit will sore to a greater height
because of what u will do,
u will be changed
we will all be proud
Ora et Labora

2008-07-11T00:09:00.001+08:00

from: http://www.yourlifehappiness.com

Sometimes people come into your life and you know right away that they were meant to be there... to serve some sort of purpose, teach you a lesson or help figure out who you are or who you want to become. You never know who these people may be but when you lock eyes with them, you know at that very moment that they will affect your life in some profound way.

And sometimes things happen to you that may seem horrible, painful and unfair, but in reflection you realize that without overcoming those obstacles you would have never realized your potential, strength, willpower or heart.

Nothing happens by chance or by means of good luck.

Illness, injury, love, lost moments of true greatness and sheer stupidity..... all occurs to test the limits of your soul. Without these small tests, life would be like a smoothly paved, straight, flat road to nowhere, safe and comfortable but dull and utterly pointless.

The people you meet affect your life. The successes and downfalls that you experience can create who you are, and the bad experiences can be learned from. In fact, they are probably the most poignant and important ones.

If someone hurts you, betrays you or breaks your heart, forgive them because they have helped you learn about trust and the importance of being cautious to whom you open your heart to.

If someone loves you, love them back unconditionally, not only because they love you, but because they are teaching you to love and open your heart and eyes to little things.

Make every day count.

Appreciate every moment and take from it everything that you possibly can, for you may never be able to experience it again.

Talk to people you have never talked to before, and actually listen.

Let yourself fall in love, break free and set your sights high.

Hold your head up because you have every right to.

Tell yourself you are a great individual and believe in yourself, for if you don't believe in yourself, no one else will believe in you.

Create your own life and then go out and live it..

well, life is like tis...
we need to have more faith in ourselves...
and everyone we see impacts us in one way or another,
like u reading this..
u have left ur mark on me, even if its small n light, but i will always remember you, all who left ur mark on me..
because of u people,
i am alive today...
i am here today...
well, its 12++ alr....my eyes r pain...
well...

2008-07-10T22:21:00.002+08:00

MYE was the worst papers ever
i got SSUDD...
how sucky
chem was a D...sigh...well
chinese was a D...sigh...wells...
maths was a U..28.5/100....lousiest maths result in my whole life....
GP was a S
phy was a S

sianz....
rushing thru GP project now
well...

The Importance of Time
(a touching short story by Bob Perks: http://www.bobperks.com)

A young man learns what's most important in life from the guy next door. It had been some time since Jack had seen the old man. College, girls, career, and life itself got in the way. In fact, Jack moved clear across the country in pursuit of his dreams. There, in the rush of his busy life, Jack had little time to think about the past and often no time to spend with his wife and son. He was working on his future and nothing could stop him.

Over the phone his mother told him, "Mr. Belser died last night. The funeral is Wednesday."

Memories flashed through his mind like an old newsreel as he sat quietly remembering his childhood days.

"Jack, did you hear me?"

"Oh sorry, Mom. Yes, I heard you. It's been so long since I thought of him. I'm sorry, but I honestly thought he died years ago," Jack said.

"Well, he didn't forget you. Every time I saw him he'd ask how you were doing. He'd reminisce about the many days you spent over 'his side of the fence' as he put it," Mom told him.

"I loved that old house he lived in." Jack said.

"You know, Jack, after your Father died, Mr. Belser stepped in to make sure you had a man's influence in your life," she said.

"He's the one who taught me carpentry," he said, "I wouldn't be in this business if it wasn't for him. He spent a lot of time teaching me things he thought were important. Mom, I'll be there for the funeral," Jack said.

As busy as he was, he kept his word. Jack caught the next flight to his hometown. Mr. Belser's funeral was small and uneventful. He had no children of his own and most of his relatives had passed away.

The night before he had to return home Jack and his Mom stopped by to see the old house next door one more time.

Standing in the doorway Jack paused for a moment. It was like crossing over into another dimension, a leap through space and time. The house was exactly as he remembered. Every step held memories. Every picture, every piece of furniture...Jack stopped suddenly.

"What's wrong, Jack?" his Mom asked.

"The box is gone," he said.

"What box?" Mom asked.

"There was a small gold box that he kept locked on top of his desk. I must have asked him a thousand times what was inside. All he'd ever tell me was, 'The thing I value most'," Jack said.

It was gone. Everything about the house was exactly how Jack remembered it except for the box. He figured someone from the Belser family had taken it.

"Now I'll never know what was so valuable to him," Jack said, "I better get some sleep. I have an early flight home, Mom."

It had been about two weeks since Mr. Belser died. Returning home from work one day Jack discovered a note in his mailbox. "Signature required on a package. No one at home. Please stop by the main post office within the next three days," the note read.

Early the next day Jack retrieved the package. The package was old and looked like it had been mailed a hundred years ago. The handwriting was difficult to read, but the return address caught his attention.

"Mr. Harold Belser" it read.

Jack took the package out to his car and ripped it open. There inside was the gold box and an envelope. Jack's hands shook as he read the note inside.

"Upon my death please forward this box and its contents to Jack Bennett. It's the thing I value most in my life". A small key was taped to the letter. His heart raced as tears filled his eyes. Jack carefully unlocked the box. There inside he found a beautiful gold pocket watch.

Running his fingers slowly over the finely etched casing, he unlatched the cover. Inside he found these words engraved:

"Jack, Thanks for your time! - Harold Belser."

"The thing he valued most...was...my time."

Jack held the watch for a few minutes, then called his office and cleared his appointments for the next two days. "Why?" Janet, his assistant, asked. "I need some time to spend with my son," he said. "Oh, by the way, Janet, thanks for your time".

well,
how many times have we not thanked someone only when we realise tt its too late?
sigh...

A story is told about a soldier who was finally coming home after having fought in Vietnam. He called his parents from San Francisco.

"Mom and Dad, I'm coming home, but I've a favor to ask. I have a friend I'd like to bring home with me."

"Sure," they replied, "we'd love to meet him."

"There's something you should know the son continued, "he was hurt pretty badly in the fighting. He stepped on a land mind and lost an arm and a leg. He has nowhere else to go, and I want him to come live with us."

"I'm sorry to hear that, son. Maybe we can help him find somewhere to live."

"No, Mom and Dad, I want him to live with us."

"Son," said the father, "you don't know what you're asking. Someone with such a handicap would be a terrible burden on us. We have our own lives to live, and we can't let something like this interfere with our lives. I think you should just come home and forget about this guy. He'll find a way to live on his own."

At that point, the son hung up the phone. The parents heard nothing more from him. A few days later, however, they received a call from the San Francisco police. Their son had died after falling from a building, they were told. The police believed it was suicide. The grief-stricken parents flew to San Francisco and were taken to the city morgue to identify the body of their son. They recognized him, but to their horror they also discovered something they didn't know, their son had only one arm and one leg.

The parents in this story are like many of us. We find it easy to love those who are good-looking or fun to have around, but we don't like people who inconvenience us or make us feel uncomfortable. We would rather stay away from people who aren't as healthy, beautiful, or smart as we are. Thankfully, there's someone who won't treat us that way. Someone who loves us with an unconditional love that welcomes us into the forever family, regardless of how messed up we are.

Tonight, before you tuck yourself in for the night, say a little prayer that God will give you the strength you need to accept people as they are, and to help us all be more understanding of those who are different from us!!!

There's a miracle called Friendship That dwells in the heart You don't know how it happens Or when it gets started But you know the special lift It always brings And you realize that Friendship Is God's most precious gift!

Friends are a very rare jewel, indeed. They make you smile and encourage you to succeed They lend an ear, they share a word of praise, and they always want to open their hearts to us.

2008-07-08T21:13:00.002+08:00

sianz...
with half the time i spend at home hearing my parents quarrel and the half quarreling with them, how on earth am i expected to study and produce good results?
wat on earth is happening at home?
sianz...

2008-07-07T21:38:00.003+08:00

hmm...some problems r more frequently appeared than others
hmm...
i c myself in u...
i dunno wat 2 say or do....

朋友

周华健

这些年一个人

风也过雨也走

有过泪有过错

还记得坚持甚么

真爱过才会懂

会寂寞会回首

终有梦终有你在心中

朋友一生一起走

那些日子不再有

一句话一辈子

一生情一杯酒

朋友不曾孤单过

一声朋友你会懂

还有伤还有痛

还要走还有我

这些年一个人

风也过雨也走

有过泪有过错

还记得坚持甚么

真爱过才会懂

会寂寞会回首

终有梦终有你在心中

朋友一生一起走

那些日子不再有

一句话一辈子

一生情一杯酒

朋友不曾孤单过

一声朋友你会懂

还有伤还有痛

还要走还有我

朋友一生一起走

那些日子不再有

一句话一辈子

一生情一杯酒

朋友不曾孤单过

一声朋友你会懂

还有伤还有痛

还要走还有我

朋友一生一起走

那些日子不再有

一句话一辈子

一生情一杯酒

朋友不曾孤单过

一声朋友你会懂

还有伤还有痛

还要走还有我

一句话一辈子

一生情一杯酒

ur my brother, my fren n we both care....in diff ways....
somehow, i feel as if i've made things worse....
sighs...
hope both of u will sleep early n tt both of u will sort it out
God bless both of u

2008-07-07T18:31:00.002+08:00

sigh...
so much thinking has been done...
iem supposed 2 be happier
but somehow, i c myself in paul.
some of the things he does is like wat i do
hmm...how shall i put it?
nvm...
shall not write it down
but my good fren,
noe wat i said was 4 ur good
i dun wan to c both of u like tis.
every week i c u 2, both of u look damn tired and emo
eh, noe how u feel for her and noe wat u wan...
deceiving urself is pointless
n there is no point in deceiving me
u have changed,
but u still care
jus b urself k?
ur like my brother 2 me...
seeing u like tis is not very nice

2008-07-07T09:36:00.001+08:00

somehow i feel tt tis retreat din give me the peace that i expected, most probably because there are other problems bugging me alot.
well, i agree with u maxi...
n i have alr made up my feelings...

i will love her as my sis

2008-07-04T21:33:00.003+08:00

lost,
iem still lost, finding directions is hard
i can only ask from a few people.
oh well,

手放开

李圣杰

我把自己关起来只留下一个阳台
每当天黑推开窗我对着夜幕发呆
看着往事一幕一幕
再次演出你我的爱
我把电视机打开听着别人的对白
也许那些故事可以给我一个交代
你要的爱我学不来
眼睁睁看情变坏人怔怔看情感概
不能给你未来我还你现在
安静结束也是另一种对待
当眼泪流下来伤已超载
分开也是另一种明白

我给你最后的疼爱是手放开
不要一张双人床中间隔着一片海
感情的污点就留给时间慢慢漂白
把爱收进胸前左边口袋

最后的疼爱是手放开
不想用言语拉扯所以选择不责怪
感情就像候车月台有人走有人来
我的心是一个站牌写着等待

最后的疼爱是手放开
我把收音机打开听着别人的失败
啃咽的声音仿佛诉说着相同悲哀
你的依赖还在胸怀
我无法轻易推开我无法随便走开
感情中专心的人容易被伤害

2008-07-04T21:25:00.000+08:00

"A child was holding a shell in his hands and was determined to fill it with the bright stars in the night, one half for his loving brother, the other half for his kind mother.
He saw that the stars were at the top of a hill not far from him, so he ran to the top of the hill. But the stars were not here.
They were still a distance in front, on another hill. So he ran to that hill, but the stars were not there. They seem to be near the sea.
The child loved his brother and mother and was determined to fill the shell with stars of the night for his brother and mother.
The sea breeze is strong, there is no other road to the stars. He could not get the stars to fill the shell. The child held the shell in his hands and wept, his tears fell into the ocean.
The second day, people found him holding the shell tightly in his cold, lifeless body.
The second night, they saw countless stars in the ocean."

How i wish that my love for you could be like the child's love for his brother and mother and that i could be really sure about my feelings. Only one person understands what situation iem in now, but, how can i put it in words?i want to treat u like a sister, i don't want to taint the love i have for you with my own selfishness.

2008-07-03T22:36:00.001+08:00

hopefully ill get my $70 tml then all i wan to do can b done.
i nid buck up on my studies alr...
chem
mug n mug, pull n pull, play n mug...
sianz

2008-07-02T21:27:00.000+08:00

我愿做无忧无虑的小孩

拜伦

我愿做无忧无虑的小孩，
栖身于广阔高原的洞穴：
在朦胧的旷野里游荡，
在蓝色的波浪上腾跃。
撒克逊浮华的繁文俗节，
正与我自由的意志相别。
坡道崎岖的山地令我眷念，
狂涛澎湃的巨石让我神悦。

命运呵，请收回丰饶的田地，
拿走这响亮的尊荣称号！
我厌恶看人们低三下四，
我厌恶被奴仆屈身照料。
让我回到我酷爱的地方，
听岩石应和大海的呼啸；
那是我从小就熟悉的风光，
只求让我再次看到。

年少的我已经觉察，
这不是为我而设的世界；
啊！幽冥的暗影为何要覆盖，
覆盖世人向尘寰的辞别？
我也曾有过梦境中的辉煌，
那是极乐之乡神奇的幻觉；
现实！你何必用可憎的明亮，
把我引导到这样一个俗界。

爱情离我而去，
友谊早已终了；
如此的心灵怎不孤寂，
当原有的希望都已失掉。
虽有欢谑的友伴共举杯，
恶劣情怀只能是瞬间避回；
纵饮可使痴狂的灵魂振奋，
可心儿啊，依然孤独伤悲。

听他们高谈阔论多无聊：
这群人与我并不相干，
可门第、权势、财富或机运，
却拉我们筳前相见。
请还给我几个忠实的朋友！
请还给我原有的青春和爱情！
躲开那喧嚣半夜的应酬，
他们的欢乐只是徒有虚名。

美丽的人啊，难道你就是
我的希望、慰籍和一切？
连你的笑靥也失去了魅力，
我的心怎能不充满寒意！
俗境是那样富丽和凄苦，
我原从此告别，毫不惋惜；
恬静使我怡然知足——
美德与它似曾相识或很熟悉。

遁离这熙攘的世界——
不是憎恶，只想躲避；
我要寻觅幽静的山谷，
让晦暗的胸怀与瞑色相依。
请给我一双翅膀吧：
像飞回巢中的斑鸠，
我也要展翅凌空，
飘然远行，安宁永久！

2008-07-02T21:16:00.001+08:00

INFP - the Healer

You scored 18% I to E, 47% N to S, 38% F to T, and 79% J to P!
You are more introverted than extroverted. You are more intuitive than observant, you are more feeling based than thinking based, and you prefer to go with the flow rather than having a plan. Your type can best be summarized by the word "Healer", which belongs to the larger group of idealists. You have a capacity for caring that is deeper than most. You strive for unity, are fascinated by the battles between good and evil, and can be something of an idealist. Only 1% of the population shares your type.
As a romantic partner, you are usually supprtive and nuturing, however, you have a high need for individuality. Harmony is extremely important to you as you are very affected by conflict and tension, which also makes you resist confronting your partner directly about problems. When you get angry, you usually blame yourself, rather than your partner. You can also be stubborn and unyielding when you feel you are being criticized or mistreated. You feel the most appreciated when your partner listens to you carefully. You need to be understood. You need to hear your partner express their feelings, the more often, the better. Your group summary: idealists (NF)
Your type summary: INFP
The Idealist

As an INFP, your primary mode of living is focused internally, where you deal with things according to how you feel about them, or how they fit into your personal value system. Your secondary mode is external, where you take things in primarily via your intuition.

INFPs, more than other iNtuitive Feeling types, are focused on making the world a better place for people. Their primary goal is to find out their meaning in life. What is their purpose? How can they best serve humanity in their lives? They are idealists and perfectionists, who drive themselves hard in their quest for achieving the goals they have identified for themselves

INFPs are highly intuitive about people. They rely heavily on their intuitions to guide them, and use their discoveries to constantly search for value in life. They are on a continuous mission to find the truth and meaning underlying things. Every encounter and every piece of knowledge gained gets sifted through the INFP's value system, and is evaluated to see if it has any potential to help the INFP define or refine their own path in life. The goal at the end of the path is always the same - the INFP is driven to help people and make the world a better place.

Generally thoughtful and considerate, INFPs are good listeners and put people at ease. Although they may be reserved in expressing emotion, they have a very deep well of caring and are genuinely interested in understanding people. This sincerity is sensed by others, making the INFP a valued friend and confidante. An INFP can be quite warm with people he or she knows well.

INFPs do not like conflict, and go to great lengths to avoid it. If they must face it, they will always approach it from the perspective of their feelings. In conflict situations, INFPs place little importance on who is right and who is wrong. They focus on the way that the conflict makes them feel, and indeed don't really care whether or not they're right. They don't want to feel badly. This trait sometimes makes them appear irrational and illogical in conflict situations. On the other hand, INFPs make very good mediators, and are typically good at solving other people's conflicts, because they intuitively understand people's perspectives and feelings, and genuinely want to help them.

INFPs are flexible and laid-back, until one of their values is violated. In the face of their value system being threatened, INFPs can become aggressive defenders, fighting passionately for their cause. When an INFP has adopted a project or job which they're interested in, it usually becomes a "cause" for them. Although they are not detail-oriented individuals, they will cover every possible detail with determination and vigor when working for their "cause".

When it comes to the mundane details of life maintenance, INFPs are typically completely unaware of such things. They might go for long periods without noticing a stain on the carpet, but carefully and meticulously brush a speck of dust off of their project booklet.

INFPs do not like to deal with hard facts and logic. Their focus on their feelings and the Human Condition makes it difficult for them to deal with impersonal judgment. They don't understand or believe in the validity of impersonal judgment, which makes them naturally rather ineffective at using it. Most INFPs will avoid impersonal analysis, although some have developed this ability and are able to be quite logical. Under stress, it's not uncommon for INFPs to mis-use hard logic in the heat of anger, throwing out fact after (often inaccurate) fact in an emotional outburst.

INFPs have very high standards and are perfectionists. Consequently, they are usually hard on themselves, and don't give themselves enough credit. INFPs may have problems working on a project in a group, because their standards are likely to be higher than other members' of the group. In group situations, they may have a "control" problem. The INFP needs to work on balancing their high ideals with the requirements of every day living. Without resolving this conflict, they will never be happy with themselves, and they may become confused and paralyzed about what to do with their lives.

INFPs are usually talented writers. They may be awkard and uncomfortable with expressing themselves verbally, but have a wonderful ability to define and express what they're feeling on paper. INFPs also appear frequently in social service professions, such as counselling or teaching. They are at their best in situations where they're working towards the public good, and in which they don't need to use hard logic.

INFPs who function in their well-developed sides can accomplish great and wonderful things, which they will rarely give themselves credit for. Some of the great, humanistic catalysts in the world have been INFPs.

Jungian functional preference ordering:

Dominant: Introverted Feeling
Auxiliary: Extraverted Intuition
Tertiary: Introverted Sensing
Inferior: Extraverted Thinking

Healers present a calm and serene face to the world, and can seem shy, even distant around others. But inside they're anything but serene, having a capacity for personal caring rarely found in the other types. Healers care deeply about the inner life of a few special persons, or about a favorite cause in the world at large. And their great passion is to heal the conflicts that trouble individuals, or that divide groups, and thus to bring wholeness, or health, to themselves, their loved ones, and their community.

Healers have a profound sense of idealism that comes from a strong personal sense of right and wrong. They conceive of the world as an ethical, honorable place, full of wondrous possibilities and potential goods. In fact, to understand Healers, we must understand that their deep commitment to the positive and the good is almost boundless and selfless, inspiring them to make extraordinary sacrifices for someone or something they believe in. Set off from the rest of humanity by their privacy and scarcity (around one percent of the population), Healers can feel even more isolated in the purity of their idealism.

Also, Healers might well feel a sense of separation because of their often misunderstood childhood. Healers live a fantasy-filled childhood-they are the prince or princess of fairy tales-an attitude which, sadly, is frowned upon, or even punished, by many parents. With parents who want them to get their head out of the clouds, Healers begin to believe they are bad to be so fanciful, so dreamy, and can come to see themselves as ugly ducklings. In truth, they are quite OK just as they are, only different from most others-swans reared in a family of ducks.

At work, Healers are adaptable, welcome new ideas and new information, are patient with complicated situations, but impatient with routine details. Healers are keenly aware of people and their feelings, and relate well with most others. Because of their deep-seated reserve, however, they can work quite happily alone. When making decisions, Healers follow their heart not their head, which means they can make errors of fact, but seldom of feeling. They have a natural interest in scholarly activities and demonstrate, like the other Idealists, a remarkable facility with language. They have a gift for interpreting stories, as well as for creating them, and thus often write in lyric, poetic fashion. Frequently they hear a call to go forth into the world and help others, a call they seem ready to answer, even if they must sacrifice their own comfort.

Princess Diana, Richard Gere, Audrey Hephurn, Albert Schweiter, George Orwell, Karen Armstrong, Aldous Huxley, Mia Farrow", and Isabel Meyers are examples of a Healer Idealists.

2008-07-02T20:34:00.002+08:00

well, parents are always parents, they do things that you never expect them to do and they think that they know you very well, but in actual fact they don't. i realise that i've said this many many many many many many many many many many many many many many many many many many many many many many many many many many many many many many many many many many many many many many many many many many many many many many many many many times, but oh well....
saturday is AP, and it jus seems that so much memory is flowing into my head.
overflow of information...
i wanna change my seat...
right now iem sitting next to Mr. Air and its weird that iem sleeping in class by myself...
last time got ant sleep 1st then i sleep
but now is i nid 2 sleep on my own..
so sad....
ok
iem going crazy...
so tired today...
slept at 4 am woke up at 5++
then play bball frm 2 to 3...gym frm 3 to 5.30...
then bball frm 6.30 to 8...
crazy day
so much thoughts, so much things to write out
so much things to say and do, but so little strength...

2008-07-01T21:00:00.000+08:00

hmm....when i listen 2 songs nowadays, i always forget the meaning of the songs 2 me...there had been so many songs that has impacted me.....sigh....

2008-07-01T18:12:00.002+08:00

you know how often the words, "i dont wanna care anymore" pops into my head, like a signal trying to tell me to run away, yet i know now that escaping's not an option. it will only lead to feeling worse.We have so much things that we want to escape from, like running away from deadlines for PW, but whats the use if we run away? we will still have to face it, might as well we face it and get it over and done with?we try to run away from past events, we try to run away from many things. stress, no matter how small, over time, changes our direction in life.
facing the problem is hard, but letting go is harder, but sometimes its better to let the other party go.if we let go, it will be better for everyone, knowing that the other party will be happier and the awkward feeling is gone.letting go of events that have hurt you is hard, we sometimes cannot forget the smallest comments made about us even if it has been long passed.We sometimes cannot forgive easily, but whats the point?forgive and forget. 做人要潇洒.

now my mind is clearer....
yesterday was super high...
went to play bball in the morning after that went to lunch then kbox...
super high...
9 people in 1 room singing Barbie Girl when the person carrying the food walked in...
how interesting....
haha...wanna noe more details, read the other ppl's blog, i lazy to write so much...
oh well, physics was screwed...
chinese the teacher got improve, but pass or not?

oh well, its time for PW...
i hate EoM
actually i hate PW, but gotta face the fact that iem taking it...
oh well...

2008-06-29T14:21:00.002+08:00

do we place those under our charge before our stupid pride and our own self rightness?do we do what is good for them or do we do what we want to because of our obligation?are we caring for those under our charge with our heart or because its our responsibility?is it out of our heart or is it because we wan recognition?or is it because we are forced to?how many times have we hurt people because of our self rightness?how many times have we unknowingly hurt someone that we should be taking care of because of our selfish actions?sometimes i wonder why i am doing some things for the unit when i could be slacking n enjoying my free time, instead of going under the hot sun and scolding people and spending time in school.but i realised that when i don't go back, i feel as if something is amiss.the unit is like another family to me.i've given four years of my life but i still fail to do some things, like developing cadets' character instead of trying to churn out awards.some will think the award matters alot but it is not a fair gauge of what the cadets have achieved.at the end of their four years in SJI NPCC, they won't remember how many gold award they got, but they will realise how much they have developed and changed and grown as a person, hopefully as a man for others, as a true Josephian/Lasallian. how are we going about to develop them to be a true Josephian with the spirit of service?by making them get a gold award?or by developing each of them into theor fullest potential?some of us have prejudice against some cadets, but it doesn't make sense if we are biased against them jus because they are slow learners.some are slow learners,but they are enthuastic and all of us have missed it, n even till now, only a few of us have noticed that they are enthuastic, but it is all too late to do anything, its a real regret.so much could be done,but by our own foolishness and complancy that we missed out one cadet who could do more for the unit and improve the unit. why can't we put down our pride and access the cadets after we get to know them better and realise that they could do so much more instead of focusing our time on trying to develop those worth developing.who decides whether someone is not worth developing?isn't all of them supposed to be developed?its us who decides it,but under what circumstances?under the fact that we don't know them well enough?as a leader we should know each and everyone of those under our charge,their strengths and weaknesses, then develop them and decide on how they could improve, instead of just deciding on what we think about them. the sad thing is that some of us don't even care about those who are slower and weaker.what happened to "the last, the lost and the least"?wat happened to the Josephian spirit?what happened to the Lasallian values that are so close to our hearts that we can vomit out what it says, but whats the use if we don't live by it?we are all proud to call ourselves Josephians but are we behaving like one?are we doing what we should be doing?what happened to developing the weaker ones?what happened to servant leadership?let the strong become better, the weak become strong and then the award is ours without having to give it a single thought. "touching lives" what happened to it?we have to inspire the cadets, touch their lives. HO onced said to Mr Sirhan, "If not for SJI i would be like those gangsters outside." can we do what SJI did to HO??

that was some rambling...oh wells, i really don't want to see the unit become a award churning machine

2008-06-28T13:33:00.000+08:00

term 3 is coming, promos in 3 months time, oh well, i just hope that term 3 will be better than term 2, but it WILL be better, because iem sure and certain. dun ask me how iem so sure, i jus feel that way...

enjoy while you can, results in a few more days....

2008-06-28T12:57:00.003+08:00

exams are finally over...its time to take a breather and slow down the pace of life for a while, to relax and to enjoy everything that has happened and the world around.
exams are a total disappointment.
how could i do well when i can't even study due to my parents quarreling?
oh well, whats pass is pass, i shall relax my mind and soul and reflect.
really looking forward to retreat next sat, don't worry, i will be down for AP.
life is good, it always have been and will always be, but its just that we don't see it.

"我是一只小小鸟
想要飞呀却飞也飞不高
我寻寻觅觅寻寻觅觅一个温暖的怀抱"

sometimes i feel like this.
there are so many good things in this world and normally we don't see it, mainly because we are too busy concentrating on things that are unimportant. we concentrate on results, on things that are useless in developing ourselves, we concentrate on the end product and most of the time, we don't care how we get to the end product, as long as we get what we want, then its ok. but its not. the process is what matters, there are many ways of getting a gold award, most think of the gold as a target and they do whatever they can so as to get the award, but we must always remember that the process of getting it is what really matters, because when u are standing on stage with your award, you remember how you did it and if you compare yourself before and after, you will notice a huge change and how you have grown and changed for the better or worse.

after four years in NPCC, i realised that i have grown and still, even to this day, i do not care about NP politics, i do not want to be involved. its a waste of time, we are a CCA for the cadets, not a CCA for gold award, we want to develop cadets into cadets that are better than gold award cadets in terms of character-wise and not force them so that we can get that stupid award which is causing us so much stress and making us so agitated. development of cadets is important, there are those who can do so much more but not given a chance and we just neglect them. this is not the way to do things, if we think of them as a joke and make jokes about them, its unfair towards them, we should not neglect anyone and we must give them chances to catch up and show that they can do it, if not, whats the point of the nco creed?

The SJI NPCC NCO CREED

I am an NCO of the SJI National Police Cadet Corps

My duty is to lead, to excel and to overcome

I lead my cadets by example. I answer for their training, morale and discipline

I must excel in everything I do

I serve with pride, honour and integrity

I will overcome adversity with courage, fortitude and determination

TO LEAD I DARE, TO EXCEL I WILL, TO OVERCOME I MUST!

we talk so much about them, yet we ourselves must remember that we made this creed, we said and have we led them by example?
have we done what is inside?
SJI NPCC is not a totally autocratic CCA, we are taught servant leadership, but how many times have we put cadets before ourselves?
most of the times we are only doing what we are supposed to do.
how many times have we done more than what is expected?
i want to change it, i want to develop cadets rather than develop a award churning machine.
if we could only concentrate on developing cadets first, then the award will come naturally, we don't need to work on it, we don't need to spend all our energy on getting the award.

2008-06-26T21:44:00.005+08:00

i got struck...by paul's blog...
"so don't you dare in your moment of anger say you do not care about that thing or person.. it may just bring more hurt and it will accumulate"
how true...
i will not try, i will do it...i will not in a moment of rage say tt i don wan to care...
cuz i always care, yet i escape by saying tt i dun wan care, so tt i can relieve myself of the heavy responsibilities that they always give me...
Paul, u hit me quite hard u noe, i really mus thank you...

well maths was gay, totally owned me...
lost over 60 marks i think.
could have been worse...
chinese was also quite gay, totaled 13pages in 3 hours, which is quite little...
so u mus b wondering y the heck iem online when i have physics tml
because............................
i dun think i can make it n iem mugging later n tml morning and failing exams r a common thing for me now.................oh well....................................................

2008-06-23T13:44:00.004+08:00

sigh...ytd had retreat...shared many things tt i would never otherwise have had shared with them...made me feel a bit better...oh wells, y do problems always seem to occur when there are major things happening and make me unable to concentrate...

1 Corinthians 13: 4-7
"Love is always patient and kind; love is never jealous; love is not boastful or conceited, it is never rude and never seeks its own advantage, it does not take offence or store up grievances. Love does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but finds its joy in the truth. It is always ready to make allowances, to trust, to hope and to endure whatever comes. "

hmm...how true, yet can anyone love like this?
the retreat was like another reflection...
i so need reflections and i get to know more bout myself and others...

"i dunno myself, cuz iem still trying to discover myself"

when i say no one noes me, i mean it, cuz only God knows who i am and what i can do and what i will be, i dunno myself, i dunno who i am...
i want to be myself, i dun wan any masks
i wan to be free, and to live away from the things that distract me
i wan to smile, a genuine smile
i wan to rest, my mind and soul
i wan to know myself
i wan so much
i get so little
i dun care
because i noe tt someday ill be myself
and i will find rest in Him
so much demands,
yet they all seem so simple
yet is it?
"knowing what u wan is the first to getting it"
bullshit
with so much things pressurizing me
how to rest?
when sch reopens, its the time 2 mug
shit

“Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind.”
(saw this on shanice's blog) like the quote...

well, this shall be last post b4 the exams...iem off to mug now..sigh...so much things running through my head...how can i concentrate?
with so much stuff to tackle....
well, people, stay happy...

2008-06-18T13:58:00.002+08:00

"life and death is just a thought away"

how true

"i died while i was alive"

i do not have suicidal thoughts in case u r wondering...
-.-

2008-06-18T07:07:00.000+08:00

i dun wanna care bout my family anymore!!!!!!

2008-06-16T20:51:00.002+08:00

there will only be 2 reasons y a guy will matchmake a gal to his friend.
1. the friend is his ultimate super duper best friend
2. the guy loves the gal but is afraid that he cannot give his all to the gal...or the guy loves the gal but dun wan to admit it........
EMO, those r 4 u....

escaping is not easy...
it makes life more tiring...
we all know that the truth and reality will catch up someday
i've been escaping for too long
not going home is one....
trying to drown myself in mugging is pointless, cuz i will stone n nothing will go inside my head..
shit...exams in a few more days and iem super unprepared

frown n stand on ur head n ur smiling....
how true...

2008-06-15T13:05:00.002+08:00

Some quotes from "The Alchemist" by Paulo Coelho

"You must understand that love never keeps a man from pursuing his destiny. If he abandons that pursuit, it's because it wasn't true love."

"One is loved because one is loved. No reason is needed for loving"

" "There is only one way to learn," the alchemist answered. "It's trough action. Everything you need to know you have learned through your journey." "

"You will never be able to escape from your heart. So it's better to listen to what it has to say."

"the fear of suffering is worse than suffering itself. And that no heart has ever suffered when it goes in search of its dreams, because every second of the search is a second's encounter with God and with eternity."

"Every search begins with beginner's luck. And every search ends with the victor's being severely tested."

"the darkest hour if the night came just before dawn"

2008-06-14T21:04:00.001+08:00

I really liked Father Joseph's Goh's homily today...
its almost as if he's talking about me. he said that everyone is facing some difficulty and that we all have felt or is feeling hurt now.
hmm...hurts...disappointments...its all part of our lives...
but somehow i feel as if i have been running away and escaping for too long already, but am i ready to face the truth now?am i ready to accept what i have run away from?running hasnt provided any comfort, yet will the truth hurt more?
will i be able to accept it?am i able?
i have done a lot to protect myself after many incidents, so much that my heart is numb and i have kept it that way for too long...its time 2 defrost it, to unnumb it, to be myself and to learn who i really am...God is always beside me, yet how many times have i forgotten that He is there??could my life get on track again?
could my life be better if i stop running away?

sigh....
thx isa for ur latest post....got me to think alot...

2008-06-12T17:14:00.003+08:00

i just came back from ubin,sec3 Survival Training Camp.
i must say that survival camp wasn't much of survival. it was more like the sec 2 ATC...seriously, if it is called survival, then make the cadets survive, not welfare them.
well, it was ok, except it rained the 1st night and they all had to sleep in bunks...lucky people.

day 1 started with treasure hunt...my route was D-E-F-A-B-C....from far away from the jetty to near the jetty then hike back to campsite...there was 1 causality...WOO JUNKAI...
forget it...after that was tent pitching...the guys took faster than expected...good job...
the night was eventful. it rained...heavily...evacuation was lousy
following instructions is so easy...we tell u not to talk, so shut up...thats it...how hard is it to stop talking for a few minutes?????

day 2 was ok...but rained again in the morning...activity cycle 1 was campfire prep/shelter building...the shelters they come up with is interesting. the explanations was even better....
after that was cycle 2...tunnel...nothing eventful happened, jus that they are still afraid and keep screaming...its expected...then jetty jump...some were afraid, but they still jumped...GOOD JOB!!and keep it up...=)
after jetty jump was lunch i think...followed by IRC ( intermediate rope challenge) i must comment on 1 person...Muhsin...u rock la...simply rocks...u walking on the rope like walking on ground like that and still can pose when u r up there...Good Job!!
fire starting was good, at least everyone chipped in and the fire started, but it was more like signal fire because the branches cannot be lighted because it was still wet, but its a good job nonetheless...i was smoked, and they had a lot of marshmallows to ea thanks to the previous group...after that was wash up and dinner...

then was the campfire..iem sorry people if i suck at being the emcee...the group performance were interesting, they all seem to love the song i hate....seriously...n i think my group did quite well, they at least had a morale for the play, though it was lame....seriously lame...but all the groups were...

CI performance was ok....
thats all i have to say bout it...

the campfire took too long, it spilled over and group and mass debrief was cancelled..
i wish i had the chance to do a last group debrief, but din...oh well, they may c me someday....

day 3 was.....arrrgggghhhhh...some people want to argue without a valid claim...if you wan hear it, come to me, ill tell u...
arguing is pointless, especially when u r in the wrong, whats more u fail to accept ur mistake, thats even worse. coming from a gold unit with such an attitude such that ur officer have to come down and scold u is so pointless...to be a leader, you must 1st accept ur own mistakes, be humble...dun think u r so good cuz there will be others better than u...there will always be people who are better and dun brag...
some people act as if they know everything and try to take control, but only worse results happen...y r people so arrogant?its pointless, it will only make people dislike u...sigh..oh and if you wan argue think of the facts 1st...n bring malties will only attract ants, we want to try to save you trouble but u dun wan...then what can i say??

DON, i DUN wan b coord for any camp....FULL STOP

it was an eventful 3 days, with me being food for mosquitoes and all the activities...

2008-06-09T23:55:00.000+08:00

sianz...going UBIN tml...so is paul...
hope ATC will go according to planned...